I had a long term relationship, we broke up, & another serious relationship just didn’t happen.I stated that I’m obviously not a virgin, and I’m not ashamed of it.But, his sister-in-law had specially accompanied me for lingerie shopping, & gotten me the ‘first night’ dress. ] I know it makes no sense, but I was feeling like a slut as I was about to have sex with a guy I barely knew. The pressure was so much that I, a 24-year-old grown ass woman, burst into tears, all the while chanting “Thank you”, “I’m so sorry”, “I can do it if you want”, “I can’t do it”. What he told me next honestly laid the foundation of our relationship.“You’re my wife & we didn’t get married for you to please me.
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We visited a few families and at last we came to the house of my to be wife.
She was sweet looking and I was struck with infatuation at first sight. There are rules prohibiting to be husband and wife to meet before wedding.
He didn’t take money from his dad, my dad, or even from my savings despite my repeated insistence.
And I have a lot of male friends, so I know how guys think. I was literally shivering as I walked back to the room.
A Quora thread discusses this issue, and the answers are convincing and brutally honest. What kind of regressive values would he impart to my future children?
In case you were curious about it too, here are the answers which would give you a peep into the lives of such couples: An anonymous woman shared her husband’s reaction on their first night I had a notion that men going for an arranged marriage are usually looking for virgin wives, & in some cases with literally not even a non-sexual ex-boyfriend. Even though he didn’t strike me as one, I kept everything on the table.
I said all this when me & my now-husband weren’t even close enough to hold hands. He said he’s glad I shared it with him, & went on to tell me about his past.
He said even though he didn’t have a preference, he didn’t expect to have a virgin wife.
I didn’t get a chance to be your friend, then fall for you & pursue you, & take you out on a first date. We jumped directly to the last step of getting married, but I still want us to have a healthy relationship. You are my wife, & I don’t want to strip you of your self respect with your clothes.
I don’t want you to just lay on your back as I claim my husband rights.
So, if he’s looking for a virginal woman, I’m not it.